I have decided that in my searching process I would like to have some support as I move along, thus I have begun looking for a suitable therapist/social worker/mental health professional to help me along the way. I had at one point wanted to wait until I had a significant other who I felt would […]Read More Adoption Therapy: Here I Come!
It turns out I have kind of a lot of information about the process surrounding my adoption. There are lots of pieces of papers, many from the Indian Government or court system and many from the two adoption agencies that my parents utilized in their quest to find the perfect child, me! They utilized Illien Adoption […]Read More What I Know or The “Facts”
I like to plan things, create routines, prioritize and then move forward. Given this proclivity I like to layout a plan for how things will go and determine the best and most efficient way to get from point Here to point Over There Somewhere. In this mindset it is always good to determine both the starting […]Read More Step 1
This piece was originally written in 2012 as a part of a short series I wrote about exploring my adoption file. I believe this was supposed to be the final piece in the four part series. I have edited it and thought it should be included. My File Part I: A Baby’s Biography My File […]Read More My File Part V: Searching for Self
Lawrence, the faithful, charming and ever-so-kind driver, pulls our sleek silver SUV into the gates of the orphanage. “It looks like a church,” I thought to myself as I peered through the windshield. A statue of the Virgin Mary welcomed us from the middle of the entrance. I was surprised. I had totally forgotten that […]Read More The Orphanage Part I: Catholic?
Nine years ago my sister and I fulfilled a wish of our late father. 13 years after being adopted and moving to southwest Ohio I would return to India with my older sister. It was my father’s wish that I return to India while he was still alive. December 25th, 2004 we set out for India. […]Read More Searching and Reunion: The First Step is Backwards
“Do you like (insert hard to understand Indian food dish)?” She hurriedly shot at me as she started to strain the boiling water out of a black pot she had just taken of the stove. She asked me expecting I would know, since I’m Indian. I couldn’t make out the name of the dish she […]Read More What Kind Of Indian Are You?
“Affidavit of Abandonment In Lieu of Birth Certificate”. It’s not everyday that I read the above title. A few days ago I was cleaning my room and reorganizing my files and I came across a manila mailing envelope that read “Kumar legal documents” in my mother’s handwriting. “How’d this get into my file?” I thought. […]Read More My File Part IV: In Lieu of Birth Certificate
[This is a continuation of My File Part II: Bites Away] A few days after graduating from college and returning to my childhood home I found myself in our dirty cobwebbed basement rummaging through Tupperware boxes. These boxes were filled with contents from my childhood. Most of the contents of the hulking green metal desk […]Read More My File Part III: Mouse Free
A theme that keeps cropping up is this idea that adoptees, although I still don’t really like that title, are not really related to their adoptive families. It seems that underlying this argument is the assumption that family is defined by who is biologically related to each other. Obviously though, as I’m sure everyone acknowledges […]Read More Family In Flux