Fragile.

Less than an hour after the brief Skype conversation with Arun and Anjali the advertised email with a handful of pictures pings into my meticulously curated inbox. I hate having unread messages in my inbox, it feels like dishes pilled on the counter, calling for attention, guilt by neglect. The normal nag of this red […]

To Reunion or Not

Months ago, in therapy, I told Dr. R that I had some emotional fantasies about reunion allowing me to close a chapter in my life. Allowing me to move on to the rest of my life, clean and simple. In some ways not pursuing reunion feels like it is holding me back. Not being in […]

Some Update

Monday, May 28, 2018 5:37am – Missed call from Arun Dohle I’m usually awake by 5:00am or just thereafter. I don’t normally get up, I’ll let my alarm go off a few times, tap snooze, and just lay there, eyes closed, often times dreading the day ahead. I always toggle the ringer on before laying […]

Fantasies, Travel and More

I’m sitting on a train right now, headed south towards Delhi. My cousin is next to me and the train is pretty full. We’ve just spent about 8 days in the Himalayan foothills and are getting ready to fly out on the 6th and 7th. It’s been mostly a mixed trip for me. I haven’t […]

Preparations

Today, I prepared for my impending trip to India by watching Black Mirror and unpacking wedding gifts that I purchased and were sent to me instead of the couples. I feel like the companies that do registries should have given me the option to have it sent to the couple and not me. Now I […]

Shit.

Search. Searching. What a strange looking word. What a strange process. What is the purpose? Why does it matter? What am I searching for? Is it a person? Is it a feeling? Is it certainty? Do I even want to find people? What would it be like to find someone? What if I don’t find […]

Itinerary

I bought a ticket a few weeks ago. Its fucking scary. After trying to find someone to tag along with me and find the best time to go I just decided to purchase a ticket and say fuck work. Work is eating me alive right now so it feels like there is no good time […]

Travel Visa

I have spent the better part of the summer trying to get all of my required documentation together to be able to apply for a tourist travel Visa to India in anticipation of returning to India in December of 2016. Back in 2011 or 2012 I began looking into applying for a Person of Indian […]

Driven by Guilt

I’ve been planing on going to India this winter for at least a few months now. It has been a stressful process and I’ve done a pretty good job of procrastinating about the important things like determining what I’m going to be doing while there. The idea really solidified itself after a few weeks of […]

Notice: Illien Adoptions International, Inc. – Accreditation Cancelled

About two weeks ago Dr. F notified me that Illien Adoptions International, Inc. had their accreditation officially cancelled, after having it suspended in 2014. SOC SEAD also had its Indian license revoked temporarily in 2014. Here is the official text from the Council on Accreditation (COA): Notice: Illien Adoptions International, Inc. “August 10, 2016 The […]